Inquirer
Last updated 02:00am (Mla time) 10/28/2007
MANILA, Philippines—This e-mail (with minor changes) was originally sent by Carlo Cruz to members of his e-group. It is being published with his permission.—ED.
GOOD DAY, EVERYONE.
I wish I were writing under different circumstances.
I would like to inform you that my wife, Leslie Cruz, was one of the casualties in the Glorietta 2 mall bombing in Makati City, Philippines.
She was supposed to have minor outpatient surgery at the Makati Medical Center (MMC) at 2:30 p.m. I had taken a leave from work to accompany her there.
We dropped off our daughter, Amber, at my parents’ place in Quezon City for babysitting at around 10 a.m. We then proceeded to Makati and got there at 12:30 p.m.
Since she had been fasting in preparation for her procedure, she wanted to move around and listen to some music while I grabbed a bite to eat.
We parked at the basement of Park Square 2, and headed for the Glorietta 2 entrance. We parted at the top of the escalator—she turned right toward Filbar’s while I went left toward the restaurants.
That was the last time I would see her.
‘My heart dropped’
At around 1:20 p.m., she called me so that we could meet at the Glorietta 2 exit just in time to make her appointment.
As I made my way there from Glorietta 1 through the connecting hallways, and was about to turn the corner, I heard two deep thumps and the shock wave from the blast hit me.
At that moment, my heart dropped as I knew that the origin of the blast was the same place where we were supposed to meet.
I tried getting to where my wife was, but the dust was too much and it was as if I was staring at a white wall.
I still tried to convince myself that she was able to make it out, and that her not responding to my calls on her mobile phone only meant that she had dropped it in the confusion.
It was only after six hours of searching, from MMC to Ospital ng Makati, the blast site, and back again to MMC, with the help of all the people I could get hold of, that I was able to get confirmation on the state of my wife.
My dad and uncle signaled me in from the ER of MMC. My uncle (who’s a doctor) asked me to describe Leslie’s appearance to another group of doctors.
I saw in the eyes of one that the description made sense. Instead of confirming it to me, they huddled together, then brought me to a small examination room.
It was only through a digital camera that I was able to confirm (and deny) that she was indeed gone.
‘I should have...’
I have so many regrets. I should have met her sooner. I should have run instead of done a brisk walk. I should have not chosen to park where I did. I should have braved the dust and went to the blast site.
I should have ...
Today’s the fourth day. It is still terribly difficult to breathe, let alone wake up realizing that your source of strength, your best friend, doesn’t lie beside you on your bed.
My deepest worry is when Amber starts asking for her Mama.
I am glad that Amber’s too young to understand the loss and pain. In time I would like to tell her the details of how her mother died, but more importantly, I would like to raise her as how her mother lived—a loving person, strong-willed, decisive, caring and nurturing.
She had always cared for her family and friends, and sacrificed her career to be a full-time mom and homemaker.
‘Cherish each moment’
Like all other couples, we had our ups and downs—none of which I regret going through. The sweet is never as sweet without the sour.
For almost four years of marriage, we had finally hit our balance in life, only for it to be taken away in an instant.
I have no regrets about our marriage. She loved me and Amber beyond her capacity. I will always love her.
It is my first time to write to an e-group as I’ve lurked and watched e-mails being sent to and fro. All I want now is for each of the couples here to cherish each moment that we spend with our loved ones.
Pretty simple to say, very easy to take for granted.
Thank you all for the prayers. I would still like to ask you to please include Leslie in them until her 40th day, so that the path to God’s kingdom will be well-lit and she will no longer be in the dark.
Sincerely,
Carlo Cruz
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